Wednesday, February 6, 2019

I Can't Believe It's 2019

Thanksgiving was a sad time. We had to say goodbye to our 15 year old schnauzer, who was suffering from kidney disease. Our lives revolved around her, and it's sad to wake up and find her missing, or come home and not be greeted by her barking and jumping on me, and to cook and not have her clean up whatever drops on the floor. In December, my oldest son Brandon got a job in Florida! I have been praying for him to come home to be with the rest of the family. I can hardly believe it, and am so happy that my prayers were answered. He also got married on the beach, and he and his wife bought a beautiful house just a few minutes away from us! It's still sinking in. The move was quite stressful, but they persevered, worked hard, asked for help, and now they're settled and moving forward. Our youngest son, Jacob, is on his final semester and has just a single class, Physics 2, to finish his pre-med undergrad degree! He is really struggling with his next step. I'm glad Spring Break is early and he's coming home soon. Maybe a little distance from school and relaxing at home will give him perspective. Jacob saved his money and decided to buy a car, so we've been helping him with that project. After considering trucks and SUV's, he finally decided he liked the little Hyundai Elantra. We found a nice used 1-owner car, private party purchase. Conrad plans to drive it to TN and fly home, but this car purchase has evolved to be the most complicated of our lives. After buying a CarFax and test driving the car, we agreed to buy it on a Friday. The owner said he would pay off the loan the next day, which he did. We then discovered we had to wait a week, because he wrote a check, and his own bank, who also financed the car, held the check for 7 days. This is our bank also, and they are also financing our loan, but using same institution hasn't streamlined the process one bit. Although Jacob was initially on the loan, the bank on another day told us he needed to be present to sign, so we dropped him from the loan. That took an entire day. We should have started from scratch, because that took less time. After we were able to move forward with buying the car, we met the seller at our mutual bank and financed the car on Friday, and the bank told us to go to the DMV for a temporary tag "at our earliest convenience." I asked when we should go several times (by this time, feeling very distrustful of our bank) and was told that very vague "At your earliest convenience." We wanted to insure the car before going to the DMV and ended up having to change insurance companies, because of course ours was the most expensive of all, over $400/month just to add this one car! Finding affordable insurance was an all-day project on Monday, so we finally stood in line at the DMV before the doors opened at 8:30 Tuesday morning. Over an hour later and three employees working for a solution, and we were unable to obtain a temporary tag, thanks to our bank requesting a paper (vs electronic) title sometime Monday. It is estimated to take 10 business days (2 weeks) before we can even consider getting a temporary title! This is SO wrong! We have a loan for a car we cannot drive. We are paying for insurance for a car we cannot drive. It's actually not even legal to have a car in our driveway that doesn't have a tag, but here we are, in limbo. I'm sure in time, all will be resolved, but we won't be able to drive the car to TN or anywhere this week, and Conrad has jury duty next week, so it looks like Jacob won't have a car to drive anytime soon. I'm trying to be patient, but Conrad is a Type A personality and stressed so much yesterday that I thought I would have to take him to the emergency room, his blood pressure was so high. Thank goodness he's better today. This has been an interesting education in car buying. Update: After calling the bank multiple times and trying to get help, my husband wrote a review to warn others of what to expect in this situation. Surprisingly, the bank called him and wanted to help! They actually were amazing! The person helping us even went to the DMV twice and overnighted the tag, so all was resolved quickly and peacefully. We loved feeling cared for and were relieved to finally get a tag for this car, but can't forget what led us to that point prior to that, where honestly no one cared at all. My husband was so frustrated, his blood pressure was so high, that I was afraid he'd have a stroke. Anyway, all was resolved positively, but it's sad that our bank only decided to resolve this at the end of this process. We have been loyal customers for years, and felt like their attitude was, "Oh well," until they suddenly decided to help, and then, yes, they went above and beyond, and we are grateful. But will we use this bank again? No. Way. Conrad continues to work on remodeling the spare bathroom. I've gotten used to the new bathtub in front of the fireplace. Like the car, I assume it will eventually get done. I still have the most wonderful and musical piano students in the world! I am grateful to share my love of music and piano with anyone interested. I absolutely love learning about each student and tailoring each lesson for their age, personality, interests, and areas of need for continual learning. Whether they're with me for a short time or for years, my goal is to impart a lifelong love of music, to educate them as much as possible in our time together, and for them to have a positive experience. I invest so much time into my students outside of lessons that the saddest thing to me as a teacher is a student who lacks enthusiasm, and honestly, those are the students that I don't enjoy teaching. They are wasting both our time. These are the students who are not supported at home by their parents. Piano teacher Irina Gorin said it best when she said she interviews and accepts parents, not students, because a student is like a bird, with the parent under one wing, and the teacher under the other, and without one or the other, the bird cannot fly.

Sunday, July 29, 2018

"Empty Nest" Summer

Although we didn't know it, the course of our summer began last semester. Our youngest, Jacob, applied to a research fellowship. We never imagined he would get in because there are so many qualified applicants. His professors' recommendations were so glowing and persuasive that he was one of 10 chosen for the S.U.R.F. research program at Loma Linda University! I must admit, we were all stunned, and my first feeling was a sinking heart that we wouldn't be spending the summer together. My husband felt the same--astounded, elated and loss, as our summer plans, time with our little buddy went down the drain. Of course we kept these parent-feelings to ourselves and supported and cheered our child on. He had a bit of time at home after his semester in Tennessee ended, and his oldest brothers were so wonderful about spending as much as possible with him. Jacob and I played some trumpet/piano music at our two local churches before he left. He flew to California and I am impressed with how comfortable he has become with airports, checking luggage, TSA, changing planes, getting an Uber or Lyft...all those grown up things. He's 20 but I'm still getting used to him being a grown up. It's taking me awhile to adjust. What a full summer! I still teach piano, although I only have a few summer students, so am not very busy. We are still active with our church. Hubby and I go to the gym together 3 times a week. We are continuing to help my parents in any way we can since they don't drive. It's mainly my husband who takes care of them. I am so thankful for him! He's taken their pool care seriously and has brought it from a green frothing cesspool to glimmering, sparkling clear blue through lots of consistent hard work. Our summer has been blessed with nonstop company. God's care and timing just amaze me! We unexpectedly hosted the sweetest French girl for a few days, and I'm so thankful that we got to know her! My sister and her husband and daughter stayed with us, and we just love hanging out with them, laughing, shopping, cooking and planning special meals at our parents together. We had a wonderful Mother's Day and Father's Day with family. We celebrated Josh's 34th birthday! My son, Brandon, who lives in Tennessee, and his fiancee came down for about a week. They did some wedding planning and celebrated his grandma's birthday and 4th of July with us, which was so much fun! I've been aching to see him, so his timing couldn't have been better. I desperately needed some Brandon time! Brent came over from Tampa for 4th of July and got to spend some time with his brother. My husband's brother and his wife, their son and energetic and adorable 5-year-old grandson visited from Atlanta for a few days. Usually it's us staying with them, at least 2 or 3 times a year, so this was such a special change and long overdue! It was so familiar and fun hanging around our little nephew! I'm grateful we got to know him better. He loved the beach and dinosaur store, making forts, our schnauzer (he has one at home) and the bin of dinosaurs that I saved. We only have one shower because we still can't find a plumber around here to install our tub, but it worked out fine except when a snake tried to take a shower with my brother-in-law! We haven't seen the snake since. We planned a very special 22nd anniversary away. We decided to take a trip instead of giving gifts. We did something completely new for us. Our criteria was someplace cooler, a big city so we could find lots to do by walking or using public transportation. My husband checked out New York and Iceland, old stomping grounds for him, but Chicago was cheaper, so that's where we went. My uncle and aunt lived near Chicago for at least 30 years, and my mom graduated from nearby Hinsdale nursing school and took us for visits when we were young. I had such good memories of Chicago restaurants and museums. Our hotel was downtown near Lake Michigan, and we walked everywhere, took Lyft, took the train and the bus. Weather cooled off while we were there and it couldn't have been more perfect. Restaurants were expensive but delicious. The museums were phenomenal! I couldn't get enough of them. We walked our feet off every day. So much to do but only so much time and energy. One day we hung out at Navy Pier, eating, shopping, and of course Conrad wanted to take a sail on the Tall Ship Windy, which was an evening sail onto Lake Michigan where we took in the fireworks, and Chicago lit up the night. We also took an architectural boat tour on the Chicago River, which I highly recommend. Chicago was an amazing experience!

Sunday, February 18, 2018

February 2018...the month of LOVE

My world changed dramatically in August 2016 when my youngest child went away to college. I became a mom when I was 20, and raising my little boys was busy and fulfilling. Now that they're adults, they are my best friends, and as each one moved out, there was a hole in my life. I miss our deep conversations and cooking together. They don't need me anymore and I am trying to figure out my purpose. But life has a way of filling in those empty spaces, and I am busy with my parents and my uncle (grocery shopping, doctors appointments), my piano students and my church. I am grateful my husband is retired, that my step-sons live nearby, my sister moved closer, and we have treasured time with my parents. It is surprising that as my parents get older, I feel as protective of them as I do my children. Life is such an interesting journey, always changing. Our country seems so angry, and everyone I know is angry about something (politics, insurance, religion--name a topic and things get heated). There is little national focus on kindness and caring, hope or inspiration, even though it is evident all around me, we mostly hear about awful or cringeworthy things. God knows what we need: Whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Wednesday, April 13, 2016

This Year, 2016

This is the year of changes! One son is marrying his beautiful sweetheart and the youngest is graduating high school, completing his AA and going away to university. I'm so happy and excited that our boys are doing what they want to do with their lives. I am so honored to be Mom to these five amazing young men. I miss them living here and am lonely for them, but we get together as often as we can.

Monday, June 18, 2012

Just Breathe

School's out! That means freedom from our routine; we were all ready for a change! Jacob's staying up late, getting up late, and playing computer games more. I love not having to watch the clock or get homeschool done before piano students arrive. The pressure's OFF! Jacob's doing a few things, but I haven't signed him up for much. We are all so relaxed for a change, and able to just breathe. I ended the school year by obsessing about planning the next school year (I know I'm not the only one that does that!). It's easy-peasy with just one partly grown homeschooled child, and with a retired husband to help run him around. I shoved all my piano lessons onto 2 days a week so I'm not tied down every day. I'm so happy I did that, although some days are long and busy. Our church music is on hiatus also. I'm thoroughly enjoying my vacation from all the time and practice for that too. I've spent way too much time going to annual doctory-type appointments. It's amazing how much time one very healthy person can spend going to those things! Teeth? Check. Eyes? Check. My eye prescription hasn't changed since 6th grade, but I did get a new pair of very cute prescription sunglasses. I still have a couple of appointments coming up. Going to these things is like a part time job. I got my first pair of orthotics for my foot drop and now I can run or shop all day! I went to my doctor who gave me a referral to a specialist (physiologist) who gave me a prescription for orthotics and a referral to a place that our insurance wouldn't cover. Our insurance told us who to go to, but that place didn't carry orthotics. On 2nd try, our insurance found us a place that actually does orthotics. This has been going on 3 or 4 months now, and I have one orthotic. The other was supposed to be shipped to me 2 weeks ago, but I'm still waiting. Anyway, one orthotic is better than no orthotic. It's called The Noodle, by the way, and it's awesome. We haven't vacationed at all yet! Just doing what we're doing--sorta "nothing"--feels like a vacation. But we're starting to feel rested and anxious to get out of town, so I'm sure we'll be doing something soon. We're debating going to Conrad's aunt's family reunion in Massachusetts, we love visiting Conrad's brother & sister-in-law in Atlanta, and we have talked for 16 years about "going out west". And of course we love the Keys and want to go diving. I can't imagine doing it all, but we'll see.

Saturday, November 12, 2011

The Thankful Month

I am so THANKFUL for my family! My husband, first and foremost, whom after all these years I'm still having an amazing love affair with. Also, I am thankful for such handsome, healthy and interesting boys, and to live near and still have my parents. I am thankful that my parents raised me to know God, for I talk to Him and depend on him daily. I am thankful my parents took me to piano lessons for years (made me continue when I wanted to stop, made me practice!), since music is such an important part of my life today and I've been able to pass it on to my children and others. I am thankful to have the necessities of life, such as a home, clothes and a car that works. I am thankful for my health; without health, life would not be so much fun. I am grateful to my country that I can CHOOSE everything in my life: I am FREE to choose my religion (Seventh-day Adventist), to eat vegan foods, homeschool my child however I want, choose whatever activities interest us, hang around people I like--and avoid those that I don't enjoy being around. We choose to live here, surrounded by our precious family, in a beautiful climate, near the water that soothes my soul to look at and to listen to, and play on and swim in. I enjoy animal-watching, and I never get tired of spotting a dolphin or a manatee, or an alligator or big gopher tortoise, or even the numerous birds, such as the interesting-looking sandhill crane with the red head, or the little kingfisher with the beak as big as its body. Every time I go to the beach, drive on the bridge over the water, or see my parents or sister or sons, I thank God that I live here to appreciate all of this. I am so blessed!

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Our Relaxing School Year

I plan our school year over the summer and am really pumped to get started with new classes, books and activities...except this year. This year looked like a continuation of last year, only even more relaxing. I was really looking forward to the freedom! Our relaxed little co-op from last year was discontinued. I taught six kids piano there. I wasn't totally crushed; I thought, "Oh, well, I guess I can sleep in on Thursdays." I looked into a couple of other awesome co-ops-- Merritt Island that I drove my older boys to for years, and in Mims, that Jacob loved before it moved so far away. My husband and I decided not to pursue classes at either co-op this year. I was relieved. It is so easy, relaxing and enjoyable to teach classes at home. Jacob is in 8th grade now and will be involved in high school and dual enrolled in college classes soon enough! The only book I bought was the next Saxon math, Algebra 1, so he could join a group at a nearby home twice a week. He tried one class and strongly disliked it, and since I only sent him because I thought he would enjoy it, I was glad to drop it and teach him at home. He and I both felt happy and relieved to do math together at our own pace once again. So that was it. School at home. Well...of course my musical child wanted to do the Homeschool Band again! He wants to be a professional trumpet player and has an awesome trumpet teacher, Jason Moylan. This will be Jacob's 4th year in the Homeschool Band with the talented, patient and soft spoken director, Liz Hyers. He started with bass clarinet and moved onto trumpet. This year he has taken up oboe as well. He learned right away that the oboe is a special instrument---especially hard, that is! He begged and begged me to find him a teacher. I asked all my facebook friends and my Brevard Homeschool Yahoo group, but no one answered, so I picked up the phone and started calling music shops. The 3rd shop, The Horn Section (which is where we found our incredible trumpet teacher) gave me a recommendation. Yay!? Ah, our quiet and simple and relaxed homeschool year...what a beautiful dream. I am so grateful my husband is retired and a kid at heart, a very interested, involved and hands-on daddy. He enthusiastically joined in the Homeschool Band last year, and took up a second instrument this year! Brave man! So for Monday band, he and Jacob are gone from 11:30-3:30. Before they leave, Jacob practices the piano (he is one of my virtuoso piano students!) and we do math together. If there is time, he may read a little more Story of the World or do a little LLATL English. When the guys get back, I'm busy with piano lessons, so they have a couple of hours and then they leave for karate at the Y, and get home at 7:30. Tuesday is currently quite a relaxing day, so we spend quite a bit of time homeschooling without looking at the clock or the rush to go somewhere. Our trumpet teacher lives nearby (currently--we are so blessed!) and comes here, and Jacob's friend also comes over for a trumpet lesson while I teach to his little sister. It is such pleasure to hang out with our friends, and often have supper together. Wednesday is another quiet day of homeschool with just one piano lesson with Jacob's friend who stays and plays for awhile, and then the guys run off to karate again for a super physical workout. Thursday is quite a busy piano-teaching day for me. I get Jacob started with his algebra and teach a couple of lessons, then we work on English and he works independently on his other subjects and practices his three instruments (guitar is dropped for now, it seems, although I thought he was incredible, he had no confidence in himself and did not enjoy it). I continue to teach all afternoon as the boys (yes, all homeschooled boys) stay and play together and sometimes fight. My husband leaves at 2:30 to take Jacob to his oboe lesson, a long drive and expensive. They kill a little time eating dinner; after the last lesson they visited the Horn Section and Jacob tried some professional trumpets ($$$$!). Then they go to Coach Mike Rochelle's Swim Team at Rockledge High School. They get home at 8:30. Jacob has wanted to take tennis for years, so I finally signed him up for 8:30 Friday morning group lessons on Merritt Island at KARS Park. So far he loves it! I think he knows everyone there, a bunch of boys about his age, most, if not all, from our Homeschool Exchange group! Every other Friday our homeschool group meets at a park, so after tennis, we go onto our park meeting. One of these days my youngest son will outgrow this group, but for now he is passionate about "exploring" and loves to talk endlessly with his friends. That is our calm homeschool week. Not as unscheduled as I expected, but I must admit, we enjoy everything we do. I am so grateful we have the choice. Last Tuesday was Brevard Zoo's $2 day, so we hung out with friends at the zoo (we are dying to try the zip line! Waiting for a sale...). I bought Jacob a late lunch there and was so pleased with the vegetarian choices, prices and quality of the food. I bought a fruit smoothie and it was delish! Then we went to the Avenue and shopped for Daddy's birthday and visited our friends the Kann's Farmer's Market. We really enjoyed selecting fresh, locally-grown vegetables and fruit! Jacob told me he had never had such a fun Tuesday. The next day, Jacob had an orthodontist appointment and we got some lunch at a smoothie place before my haircut appointment. Jacob said, "I've had so much fun, I've missed spending time with you." I was kind of stunned that I felt exactly the same way! We spend most of our time together, but this was different, so I knew what he meant. Now that Dad drives him everywhere, he and I don't have that alone-in-the-car time, or hanging outside of the house alone
time, that we had before Dad retired, so I hope to dedicate time in the future to just us.