I Can't Believe It's 2019

Thanksgiving was a sad time. We had to say goodbye to our 15 year old schnauzer, who was suffering from kidney disease. Our lives revolved around her, and it's sad to wake up and find her missing, or come home and not be greeted by her barking and jumping on me, and to cook and not have her clean up whatever drops on the floor. In December, my oldest son Brandon got a job in Florida! I have been praying for him to come home to be with the rest of the family. I can hardly believe it, and am so happy that my prayers were answered. He also got married on the beach, and he and his wife bought a beautiful house just a few minutes away from us! It's still sinking in. The move was quite stressful, but they persevered, worked hard, asked for help, and now they're settled and moving forward. Our youngest son, Jacob, is on his final semester and has just a single class, Physics 2, to finish his pre-med undergrad degree! He is really struggling with his next step. I'm glad Spring Break is early and he's coming home soon. Maybe a little distance from school and relaxing at home will give him perspective. Jacob saved his money and decided to buy a car, so we've been helping him with that project. After considering trucks and SUV's, he finally decided he liked the little Hyundai Elantra. We found a nice used 1-owner car, private party purchase. Conrad plans to drive it to TN and fly home, but this car purchase has evolved to be the most complicated of our lives. After buying a CarFax and test driving the car, we agreed to buy it on a Friday. The owner said he would pay off the loan the next day, which he did. We then discovered we had to wait a week, because he wrote a check, and his own bank, who also financed the car, held the check for 7 days. This is our bank also, and they are also financing our loan, but using same institution hasn't streamlined the process one bit. Although Jacob was initially on the loan, the bank on another day told us he needed to be present to sign, so we dropped him from the loan. That took an entire day. We should have started from scratch, because that took less time. After we were able to move forward with buying the car, we met the seller at our mutual bank and financed the car on Friday, and the bank told us to go to the DMV for a temporary tag "at our earliest convenience." I asked when we should go several times (by this time, feeling very distrustful of our bank) and was told that very vague "At your earliest convenience." We wanted to insure the car before going to the DMV and ended up having to change insurance companies, because of course ours was the most expensive of all, over $400/month just to add this one car! Finding affordable insurance was an all-day project on Monday, so we finally stood in line at the DMV before the doors opened at 8:30 Tuesday morning. Over an hour later and three employees working for a solution, and we were unable to obtain a temporary tag, thanks to our bank requesting a paper (vs electronic) title sometime Monday. It is estimated to take 10 business days (2 weeks) before we can even consider getting a temporary title! This is SO wrong! We have a loan for a car we cannot drive. We are paying for insurance for a car we cannot drive. It's actually not even legal to have a car in our driveway that doesn't have a tag, but here we are, in limbo. I'm sure in time, all will be resolved, but we won't be able to drive the car to TN or anywhere this week, and Conrad has jury duty next week, so it looks like Jacob won't have a car to drive anytime soon. I'm trying to be patient, but Conrad is a Type A personality and stressed so much yesterday that I thought I would have to take him to the emergency room, his blood pressure was so high. Thank goodness he's better today. This has been an interesting education in car buying. Update: After calling the bank multiple times and trying to get help, my husband wrote a review to warn others of what to expect in this situation. Surprisingly, the bank called him and wanted to help! They actually were amazing! The person helping us even went to the DMV twice and overnighted the tag, so all was resolved quickly and peacefully. We loved feeling cared for and were relieved to finally get a tag for this car, but can't forget what led us to that point prior to that, where honestly no one cared at all. My husband was so frustrated, his blood pressure was so high, that I was afraid he'd have a stroke. Anyway, all was resolved positively, but it's sad that our bank only decided to resolve this at the end of this process. We have been loyal customers for years, and felt like their attitude was, "Oh well," until they suddenly decided to help, and then, yes, they went above and beyond, and we are grateful. But will we use this bank again? No. Way. Conrad continues to work on remodeling the spare bathroom. I've gotten used to the new bathtub in front of the fireplace. Like the car, I assume it will eventually get done. I still have the most wonderful and musical piano students in the world! I am grateful to share my love of music and piano with anyone interested. I absolutely love learning about each student and tailoring each lesson for their age, personality, interests, and areas of need for continual learning. Whether they're with me for a short time or for years, my goal is to impart a lifelong love of music, to educate them as much as possible in our time together, and for them to have a positive experience. I invest so much time into my students outside of lessons that the saddest thing to me as a teacher is a student who lacks enthusiasm, and honestly, those are the students that I don't enjoy teaching. They are wasting both our time. These are the students who are not supported at home by their parents. Piano teacher Irina Gorin said it best when she said she interviews and accepts parents, not students, because a student is like a bird, with the parent under one wing, and the teacher under the other, and without one or the other, the bird cannot fly.

"Empty Nest" Summer

Although we didn't know it, the course of our summer began last semester. Our youngest, Jacob, applied to a research fellowship. We never imagined he would get in because there are so many qualified applicants. His professors' recommendations were so glowing and persuasive that he was one of 10 chosen for the S.U.R.F. research program at Loma Linda University! I must admit, we were all stunned, and my first feeling was a sinking heart that we wouldn't be spending the summer together. My husband felt the same--astounded, elated and loss, as our summer plans, time with our little buddy went down the drain. Of course we kept these parent-feelings to ourselves and supported and cheered our child on. He had a bit of time at home after his semester in Tennessee ended, and his oldest brothers were so wonderful about spending as much as possible with him. Jacob and I played some trumpet/piano music at our two local churches before he left. He flew to California and I am impressed with how comfortable he has become with airports, checking luggage, TSA, changing planes, getting an Uber or Lyft...all those grown up things. He's 20 but I'm still getting used to him being a grown up. It's taking me awhile to adjust. What a full summer! I still teach piano, although I only have a few summer students, so am not very busy. We are still active with our church. Hubby and I go to the gym together 3 times a week. We are continuing to help my parents in any way we can since they don't drive. It's mainly my husband who takes care of them. I am so thankful for him! He's taken their pool care seriously and has brought it from a green frothing cesspool to glimmering, sparkling clear blue through lots of consistent hard work. Our summer has been blessed with nonstop company. God's care and timing just amaze me! We unexpectedly hosted the sweetest French girl for a few days, and I'm so thankful that we got to know her! My sister and her husband and daughter stayed with us, and we just love hanging out with them, laughing, shopping, cooking and planning special meals at our parents together. We had a wonderful Mother's Day and Father's Day with family. We celebrated Josh's 34th birthday! My son, Brandon, who lives in Tennessee, and his fiancee came down for about a week. They did some wedding planning and celebrated his grandma's birthday and 4th of July with us, which was so much fun! I've been aching to see him, so his timing couldn't have been better. I desperately needed some Brandon time! Brent came over from Tampa for 4th of July and got to spend some time with his brother. My husband's brother and his wife, their son and energetic and adorable 5-year-old grandson visited from Atlanta for a few days. Usually it's us staying with them, at least 2 or 3 times a year, so this was such a special change and long overdue! It was so familiar and fun hanging around our little nephew! I'm grateful we got to know him better. He loved the beach and dinosaur store, making forts, our schnauzer (he has one at home) and the bin of dinosaurs that I saved. We only have one shower because we still can't find a plumber around here to install our tub, but it worked out fine except when a snake tried to take a shower with my brother-in-law! We haven't seen the snake since. We planned a very special 22nd anniversary away. We decided to take a trip instead of giving gifts. We did something completely new for us. Our criteria was someplace cooler, a big city so we could find lots to do by walking or using public transportation. My husband checked out New York and Iceland, old stomping grounds for him, but Chicago was cheaper, so that's where we went. My uncle and aunt lived near Chicago for at least 30 years, and my mom graduated from nearby Hinsdale nursing school and took us for visits when we were young. I had such good memories of Chicago restaurants and museums. Our hotel was downtown near Lake Michigan, and we walked everywhere, took Lyft, took the train and the bus. Weather cooled off while we were there and it couldn't have been more perfect. Restaurants were expensive but delicious. The museums were phenomenal! I couldn't get enough of them. We walked our feet off every day. So much to do but only so much time and energy. One day we hung out at Navy Pier, eating, shopping, and of course Conrad wanted to take a sail on the Tall Ship Windy, which was an evening sail onto Lake Michigan where we took in the fireworks, and Chicago lit up the night. We also took an architectural boat tour on the Chicago River, which I highly recommend. Chicago was an amazing experience!

February 2018...the month of LOVE

My world changed dramatically in August 2016 when my youngest child went away to college. I became a mom when I was 20, and raising my little boys was busy and fulfilling. Now that they're adults, they are my best friends, and as each one moved out, there was a hole in my life. I miss our deep conversations and cooking together. They don't need me anymore and I am trying to figure out my purpose. But life has a way of filling in those empty spaces, and I am busy with my parents and my uncle (grocery shopping, doctors appointments), my piano students and my church. I am grateful my husband is retired, that my step-sons live nearby, my sister moved closer, and we have treasured time with my parents. It is surprising that as my parents get older, I feel as protective of them as I do my children. Life is such an interesting journey, always changing. Our country seems so angry, and everyone I know is angry about something (politics, insurance, religion--name a topic and things get heated). There is little national focus on kindness and caring, hope or inspiration, even though it is evident all around me, we mostly hear about awful or cringeworthy things. God knows what we need: Whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

This Year, 2016

This is the year of changes! One son is marrying his beautiful sweetheart and the youngest is graduating high school, completing his AA and going away to university. I'm so happy and excited that our boys are doing what they want to do with their lives. I am so honored to be Mom to these five amazing young men. I miss them living here and am lonely for them, but we get together as often as we can.

Just Breathe

School's out! That means freedom from our routine; we were all ready for a change! Jacob's staying up late, getting up late, and playing computer games more. I love not having to watch the clock or get homeschool done before piano students arrive. The pressure's OFF! Jacob's doing a few things, but I haven't signed him up for much. We are all so relaxed for a change, and able to just breathe. I ended the school year by obsessing about planning the next school year (I know I'm not the only one that does that!). It's easy-peasy with just one partly grown homeschooled child, and with a retired husband to help run him around. I shoved all my piano lessons onto 2 days a week so I'm not tied down every day. I'm so happy I did that, although some days are long and busy. Our church music is on hiatus also. I'm thoroughly enjoying my vacation from all the time and practice for that too. I've spent way too much time going to annual doctory-type appointments. It's amazing how much time one very healthy person can spend going to those things! Teeth? Check. Eyes? Check. My eye prescription hasn't changed since 6th grade, but I did get a new pair of very cute prescription sunglasses. I still have a couple of appointments coming up. Going to these things is like a part time job. I got my first pair of orthotics for my foot drop and now I can run or shop all day! I went to my doctor who gave me a referral to a specialist (physiologist) who gave me a prescription for orthotics and a referral to a place that our insurance wouldn't cover. Our insurance told us who to go to, but that place didn't carry orthotics. On 2nd try, our insurance found us a place that actually does orthotics. This has been going on 3 or 4 months now, and I have one orthotic. The other was supposed to be shipped to me 2 weeks ago, but I'm still waiting. Anyway, one orthotic is better than no orthotic. It's called The Noodle, by the way, and it's awesome. We haven't vacationed at all yet! Just doing what we're doing--sorta "nothing"--feels like a vacation. But we're starting to feel rested and anxious to get out of town, so I'm sure we'll be doing something soon. We're debating going to Conrad's aunt's family reunion in Massachusetts, we love visiting Conrad's brother & sister-in-law in Atlanta, and we have talked for 16 years about "going out west". And of course we love the Keys and want to go diving. I can't imagine doing it all, but we'll see.

The Thankful Month

I am so THANKFUL for my family! My husband, first and foremost, whom after all these years I'm still having an amazing love affair with. Also, I am thankful for such handsome, healthy and interesting boys, and to live near and still have my parents. I am thankful that my parents raised me to know God, for I talk to Him and depend on him daily. I am thankful my parents took me to piano lessons for years (made me continue when I wanted to stop, made me practice!), since music is such an important part of my life today and I've been able to pass it on to my children and others. I am thankful to have the necessities of life, such as a home, clothes and a car that works. I am thankful for my health; without health, life would not be so much fun. I am grateful to my country that I can CHOOSE everything in my life: I am FREE to choose my religion (Seventh-day Adventist), to eat vegan foods, homeschool my child however I want, choose whatever activities interest us, hang around people I like--and avoid those that I don't enjoy being around. We choose to live here, surrounded by our precious family, in a beautiful climate, near the water that soothes my soul to look at and to listen to, and play on and swim in. I enjoy animal-watching, and I never get tired of spotting a dolphin or a manatee, or an alligator or big gopher tortoise, or even the numerous birds, such as the interesting-looking sandhill crane with the red head, or the little kingfisher with the beak as big as its body. Every time I go to the beach, drive on the bridge over the water, or see my parents or sister or sons, I thank God that I live here to appreciate all of this. I am so blessed!

Our Relaxing School Year

I plan our school year over the summer and am really pumped to get started with new classes, books and activities...except this year. This year looked like a continuation of last year, only even more relaxing. I was really looking forward to the freedom! Our relaxed little co-op from last year was discontinued. I taught six kids piano there. I wasn't totally crushed; I thought, "Oh, well, I guess I can sleep in on Thursdays." I looked into a couple of other awesome co-ops-- Merritt Island that I drove my older boys to for years, and in Mims, that Jacob loved before it moved so far away. My husband and I decided not to pursue classes at either co-op this year. I was relieved. It is so easy, relaxing and enjoyable to teach classes at home. Jacob is in 8th grade now and will be involved in high school and dual enrolled in college classes soon enough! The only book I bought was the next Saxon math, Algebra 1, so he could join a group at a nearby home twice a week. He tried one class and strongly disliked it, and since I only sent him because I thought he would enjoy it, I was glad to drop it and teach him at home. He and I both felt happy and relieved to do math together at our own pace once again. So that was it. School at home. Well...of course my musical child wanted to do the Homeschool Band again! He wants to be a professional trumpet player and has an awesome trumpet teacher, Jason Moylan. This will be Jacob's 4th year in the Homeschool Band with the talented, patient and soft spoken director, Liz Hyers. He started with bass clarinet and moved onto trumpet. This year he has taken up oboe as well. He learned right away that the oboe is a special instrument---especially hard, that is! He begged and begged me to find him a teacher. I asked all my facebook friends and my Brevard Homeschool Yahoo group, but no one answered, so I picked up the phone and started calling music shops. The 3rd shop, The Horn Section (which is where we found our incredible trumpet teacher) gave me a recommendation. Yay!? Ah, our quiet and simple and relaxed homeschool year...what a beautiful dream. I am so grateful my husband is retired and a kid at heart, a very interested, involved and hands-on daddy. He enthusiastically joined in the Homeschool Band last year, and took up a second instrument this year! Brave man! So for Monday band, he and Jacob are gone from 11:30-3:30. Before they leave, Jacob practices the piano (he is one of my virtuoso piano students!) and we do math together. If there is time, he may read a little more Story of the World or do a little LLATL English. When the guys get back, I'm busy with piano lessons, so they have a couple of hours and then they leave for karate at the Y, and get home at 7:30. Tuesday is currently quite a relaxing day, so we spend quite a bit of time homeschooling without looking at the clock or the rush to go somewhere. Our trumpet teacher lives nearby (currently--we are so blessed!) and comes here, and Jacob's friend also comes over for a trumpet lesson while I teach to his little sister. It is such pleasure to hang out with our friends, and often have supper together. Wednesday is another quiet day of homeschool with just one piano lesson with Jacob's friend who stays and plays for awhile, and then the guys run off to karate again for a super physical workout. Thursday is quite a busy piano-teaching day for me. I get Jacob started with his algebra and teach a couple of lessons, then we work on English and he works independently on his other subjects and practices his three instruments (guitar is dropped for now, it seems, although I thought he was incredible, he had no confidence in himself and did not enjoy it). I continue to teach all afternoon as the boys (yes, all homeschooled boys) stay and play together and sometimes fight. My husband leaves at 2:30 to take Jacob to his oboe lesson, a long drive and expensive. They kill a little time eating dinner; after the last lesson they visited the Horn Section and Jacob tried some professional trumpets ($$$$!). Then they go to Coach Mike Rochelle's Swim Team at Rockledge High School. They get home at 8:30. Jacob has wanted to take tennis for years, so I finally signed him up for 8:30 Friday morning group lessons on Merritt Island at KARS Park. So far he loves it! I think he knows everyone there, a bunch of boys about his age, most, if not all, from our Homeschool Exchange group! Every other Friday our homeschool group meets at a park, so after tennis, we go onto our park meeting. One of these days my youngest son will outgrow this group, but for now he is passionate about "exploring" and loves to talk endlessly with his friends. That is our calm homeschool week. Not as unscheduled as I expected, but I must admit, we enjoy everything we do. I am so grateful we have the choice. Last Tuesday was Brevard Zoo's $2 day, so we hung out with friends at the zoo (we are dying to try the zip line! Waiting for a sale...). I bought Jacob a late lunch there and was so pleased with the vegetarian choices, prices and quality of the food. I bought a fruit smoothie and it was delish! Then we went to the Avenue and shopped for Daddy's birthday and visited our friends the Kann's Farmer's Market. We really enjoyed selecting fresh, locally-grown vegetables and fruit! Jacob told me he had never had such a fun Tuesday. The next day, Jacob had an orthodontist appointment and we got some lunch at a smoothie place before my haircut appointment. Jacob said, "I've had so much fun, I've missed spending time with you." I was kind of stunned that I felt exactly the same way! We spend most of our time together, but this was different, so I knew what he meant. Now that Dad drives him everywhere, he and I don't have that alone-in-the-car time, or hanging outside of the house alone

time, that we had before Dad retired, so I hope to dedicate time in the future to just us.

My New Primitive

Our new kitchen is beautiful, but I had a place for everything in the old kitchen, and trying to figure out where everything goes has been a surprising challenge. I used to have an empty wall with a huge bulletin board for all our phone numbers and calendar. Now it's all cabinets. It was tough finding a place for the calendar, but it's working out on the end of the pantry cabinet near the phone, where it needs to be. Our grocery list and a variety of other papers have ended up on the counter and looked really messy and disorganized. I was so thrilled when I found an antique primitive library card holder on craigslist! The owner was nearby, so my husband and I ran right over and I fell in love with it. It is on my counter and each of the four drawers holds important papers. More than neat and tidy--cuuuute!

Vacations Have To End Sometime

December flew by in a blur. I hung on for the ride and loved it, but it ended too quickly. It is Monday and we will homeschool, have band and piano lessons as usual.

Our last vacation weekend was an exhilarating way to celebrate New Year's. 1/1/11 (I just love writing that!) was Sabbath, so we went to church and enjoyed my little friend's baptism, lovely music and delicious vegetarian potluck. Our son went to a sleepover, so Conrad and I appreciated some uninterrupted time alone. It was a beautiful day, sunny and warm with a cool breeze, mid-70's, perfect for a long motorcycle ride. Soaking up the sun and clinging to Conrad filled me with joy, and I fell more deeply in love with my husband.

Sunday, I really wanted to visit my older boys who moved into an apartment across from college. I'm their mother and felt like a visit was long overdue. We loaded up a dresser, chairs, microwave and crockpot, picked up our younger son, and made the long drive south. I can see why they got tired of driving it every day! I was surprised their place looks so new and clean. I felt so much better after seeing what a nice place it is, and convenient for them. A church is nearby, so I hope they go and love it. Brandon made homemade noodles for dinner and we had a nice time eating and talking, sitting in the chairs we brought down. Now my living room is empty and we have a guest bedroom.

Choices

I'm going to bring up the kitchen again. I'm very tired of talking about it, but it is still a work in progress. I have had to make so many choices that my brain hurts! Lowe's is coming Jan. 6 to rip out Diamond-damaged cabinets and install replacements, and to finish all the little details that were left undone. This is supposed to be the last time. After this, it's all on Conrad. We still have to choose flooring (we've moved on from lovely cork to durable tile), backsplash (I am seriously leaning toward white subway tile--simple) and we need some sort of light for over the kitchen island. Also, when we planned this kitchen, we did not plan for a spot for our trash can! So it is in the way, against my John Boos kitchen work island that I must sell, because it's too big and in the middle of the kitchen. I love it and we constantly use it, so felt very ambivalent about putting it on Craigslist, and was partly relieved when the people that contacted me never showed up (typical Craislist!).

How To Stay Warm In Florida

The day-after-Christmas was a big cleanup day here at home and finding places for brand new gifts. A lot of people take advantage of sales, but that has never interested me since I don't need anything and don't like crowds. The day also became very windy and cold. My husband is always hot and I'm always cold, so we play a sort of tug o' war with the thermostat. For Christmas he bought me leg warmers and a foot heating pad for the bed. I put flannel sheets on the bed. My bedroom was Christmas Storing, Staging and Wrapping Area, so my happiest accomplishment was clearing off the treadmill. It feels great to get back on it and walk off some Christmas leftovers, and as this cold weather has continued, I've also discovered that when I'm chilly, a walk on the treadmill warms me right up--without touching the thermostat.

Peanut Butter and Chocolate

Peanut butter and chocolate is a scary-delicious combination. I rarely combine them because I don't want to test my willpower. Christmas was an exception. I mean, if there's ever an occasion for treats you shouldn't eat, Christmas is it! Thankfully, my son made Buckeyes recently and followed the recipe diligently, but they were so soft and gooey that they looked like mini cow pies. They must have tasted terrific though, because they disappeared. I thought the problem must have been our peanut butter, which is natural organic and very runny. I found a Smart Balance chunky peanut butter and decided to see how that worked. I couldn't find a recipe I was totally happy with--other recipes ask for a lot of powdered sugar and butter and omit the graham cracker, but I prefer the texture with it. So I used 2 cups peanut butter, 1 cup graham cracker crumbs and 2 cups powdered sugar. I had to mix it in my food processor because it got very stiff. Then I made small balls and put them in a wax paper-lined container and refrigerated them for an hour, then I dipped them in melted chocolate chips and put them back in the refrigerator. WOW! I highly recommend these! And if you're afraid of eating too many, this recipe can be cut in half:)

Go Truffles!

A few people think vegetarians are weird and bizarre hippies, but I was just raised that way. The thought of eating a dead animal turns my stomach, so I don't. I like to eat organic and am usually vegan, but I try not to stress about food. I've seen a lot of people become fanatical about food, and I refuse to do that. Just trying to keep it in perspective. Life is for living.

My wonderful husband (who is an omnivore like a bear) gave me truffle oil for Christmas. Tonight I made eggplant parmesan and had my first truffle taste. It smelled rather different and strong, almost musky or smokey, so I wasn't sure if I would like it or not. My 12 year old son had never been brave enough to try eggplant, but his truffle curiosity made him throw caution to the wind. We all agree. The verdict is: divine!

I'm Dreaming of a Warm Christmas

Christmas morning, it was still dark, but I woke up and flew out of bed almost at the same moment so I could get fill up the eight stockings before Jake got up. He came out about half an hour later, and we all opened our stockings (including the dog). We packed up the other four boys' stockings to take to them. We opened our gifts under the tree, and finally got ready for church.

Church was such a blessing! Everyone was dressed beautifully and was so friendly and loving. A couple of friends gave me gifts! There was a lot of beautiful music, and I was in the audience and able to just sit with the family, relax, and enjoy. I usually like to saunter out of church, talking and hugging friends as I slowly wind my way through the crowd; but Conrad rushed and nagged me until I finally got into the car. Then we rushed home and scrambled to get all the presents and food packed.

We all converged on my parents for Christmas lunch. My family is vegetarian, so I spent Christmas Eve happily puttering about the kitchen, and we contributed green bean casserole (reheated so the fried onions would get nice and crunchy), yellow squash casserole (Conrad suddenly loves squash), pumpkin cranberry bread, dill bread, sugar cookies, buckeyes and supplies for our family's favorite hot spicy fruit drink, wassail. My mom bought a vegetarian roast and made mashed potatoes and gravy, toasted french bread, a corn dish, and lots of pies! Wow, we were all stuffed. Our boys were going on to another meal--Brandon and Brent were going to their dad's for supper and Juddy and Josh were going home for supper (made by Juddy's girlfriend Annie) with Annie's mom and aunt.

Today---the day-after Christmas---we did a ton of laundry and I cleaned up. We are enjoying our Christmas gifts. I have to send one back. For the first time ever, Jacob and I made homemade pretzels. They were a lot of fun and delicious!

Christmas Anticipation!

This past week was the beginning of the end of 2010...last homeschool co-op for the year (fun Christmas party, by the way!), last homeschool park day (perfect sunshiny warm weather for our annual gingerbread house decorating!), last piano lesson with a student whom I've had for six years (sniff, sniff!), and last rehearsal before our church choir's Christmas cantata, which was performed at Titusville and Cocoa churches. They did an awesome job for a little choir! God was with us. We are participating in a friend's Christmas program for Parrish Hospital on Monday, and Conrad and Jacob have band rehearsal in the afternoon and performance that night. I'm so excited! Conrad's first performance since he took up trombone in August! Jacob will be first trumpet. His trumpet teacher has brought him a long ways!

For my family, Christmas is not about the gifts...although we do like to give and to receive...I just love being together with my wonderful family, whatever the excuse.

Winter in Florida

I can't believe 2010 is almost over. This year just flew by. There is snow up north and frost here in Florida. Our heat hasn't stopped all morning.

Today I am officially middle aged. I don't feel different, but I am glad I don't have to look at myself. Aside from the getting older part, I feel so loved on my birthday. We had a party with my parents and the boys Sunday night. My mom made one of my favorites, taco salad, and my parents gave me a sweet card and gifts. Josh's card was so touching. Brandon and Brent gave me candles that smell so good I want to eat them. I also got a 2011 calendar, which I needed. I've already scribbled all over it.

Conrad saved his gift to me for my actual birthday, and I couldn't wait to open it. He gave me a laptop! I'm getting used to it. I'll appreciate not having to wait for someone to get off the computer! The hard part has been trying to figure out my passwords (uh oh!).

Jacob doesn't feel well today; surprisingly, it's not allergies. I think he has the stomach flu, poor thing, so no school today.

The month of November was hectic and rewarding. I had a piano recital, and although nine people could not attend, it was a lot of fun and I'm glad we did it, even if we were a small group. The kids were awesome! The following weekend my son's violin teacher had a recital. I was accompanying a student, so I was nervous, but it turned out to be enjoyable. One of Jacob's friends, also my piano student, was in the recital. He surprised and impressed me by playing his cello so well! Afterward, we went to eat with them and played at the park until dark. Brandon and Brent's dad showed up with his family and they went to Olive Garden together. Brent's performance was AMAZING! He chose a tough piece and blew me---all of us---away! Wow! My wonderful parents came to both my recital and Brent's. They are so supportive and I really appreciate them.

Brandon and Brent are taking final exams this week, so I'm praying continually for them. They just rented an apartment across from their college so they won't have that long drive every day. They lived with my parents this semester. It was nice knowing my parents could ask the boys for help if they needed it. Brent quit violin lessons, which is so sad. I guess he's been taking lessons for about 9 years now and wants to focus on college. When I quit piano lessons, I stayed motivated and challenged by playing for church and the choir, and I hope Brent finds something that motivates him and keeps him playing.

I need to get ready for Christmas! I hope to get the tree up today. We have a few performances this month through our church, band, a friend's program for a local hospital, and our homeschool group.

We went to Cracker Christmas. I enjoy walking around outside under the huge moss laden oak trees in the beautiful brisk, sunshiny weather. I love to browse the homemade crafts and eat fresh hot salty-sweet kettle corn. We wandered around the pioneer area where blacksmiths were heating iron until it was red hot, and hammering it into shapes, like tools and potracks. People dressed like pioneers from 1800's were making soap and rope. Jacob chewed sugar cane while we watched them make cane syrup.

Our church had a Christmas party. The food was delicious, and the brilliant planner had a huge slide outside for the kids so the adults could stay inside and talk where it was quiet and warm. There were so many friends I wanted to talk to that I ran out of time.

October

The fall weather has been a big surprise! We Floridians are soaking it up, turning off the air conditioning and letting the breezes flow through the house, and spending as much time outside in the sunny coolness as we can.

I'm trying to plan a piano recital. It's a big hassle trying to get everyone together on one date and then I have to get a location. Conrad said, "Why don't you just have one at 12:00 at the co-op?" That's our Thursday homeschool classes we're involved in, and I teach 7 homeschoolers that day. Add Jake and my other homeschool students, and we would have quite a crowd. The only down side is it would eliminate all the regular school kids, so I think I will continue to plan a regular recital, and keep a co-op recital in mind for Christmas and spring.

I think we're adjusting to homeschooling with the addition of Jacob's homework for his three co-op classes along with band music and trumpet lessons. He gets very stressed and is in puberty. Poor kid.

The kitchen is still a work in progress, but it is completely functional. Lowe's came over Friday and made a list of things they have to order and install. We're waiting for them to be done before Conrad installs tile backsplash and tile floor. I was surprised that I wasn't thrilled to have my kitchen installed, but I just felt numb. It took a day alone at home, cleaning up the REST of the house, for me to start feeling happy about it, and it's been a growing feeling of peace and appreciation as I've started to use it.

Getting Back To Normal

Counters were put in this week! I was looking forward to having a kitchen sink. Who knew it would turn out to be 3 days' work for poor Conrad. The new faucet was defective; when the counter installers pushed the dishwasher back, they disconnected a hose; our old disposal didn't work and had to be replaced, and there was leakage from the pipes. Let's just say water gushed from every imaginable spot. Conrad worked on it Tues. and Wed., which was his birthday. He finally took a break for supper, and the 4 older boys came home so the whole family was together for Chinese takeout birthday dinner. It was really nice. The sink still leaks a little occasionally, but it's usable. The new sink is so deep that I feel like I'm reaching into a hole!

I spent a lot of time sorting through things, getting rid massive amounts of stuff, putting things away and cleaning drywall dust off everything. It's slow progress, but even baby steps toward cleanliness and order lift my spirits! I don't know what to do with Conrad's clutter, and there's a lot of it.

Jacob's schooling has been hectic! By the time I can relax in the evening, I'm exhausted. He is doing a lot of great things though. He is loving his dad's marine science homeschool high school co-op class. Conrad spends many hours preparing and trying to make it as interesting and hands-on as possible. They had a field trip Friday at the river. I missed out on the sunshine, fresh air and chatting with my friends, because I knew I needed a day at home alone, cleaning up, more. "I'm a strange person," I thought to myself.

It's the end of "CMT Awareness Week". I had grand plans to post a CMT fact on Facebook every day, but after posting twice, couldn't think of anything else to say! Unbelievable. I'm actually not that comfortable talking about it either. Anyway, if all 200 of my friends actually read what I posted, then they know more now than they did before. Small comfort. My CMT is affecting me personally with my right foot drop and hands, especially my right hand. My hands are becoming paralyzed and it's really hard to play the piano if I have to reach up to the black notes with paralyzed fingers! That is a little depressing. Stairs have been hard for me for years, and it seems like everything Jacob goes to require me to pull myself up stairs! I look at them with fear and trepidation, sigh, and switch all my stuff to my left side and pull up the rail with my right. It's slow and embarrassing, especially if I'm in a group of friends (which is almost always). I feel bad for whoever is trapped behind me too.

I'm happy with my life. I enjoy it thoroughly and am blessed with a loving family.

Kitchen Lights & Floors

Conrad removed the dusty, ugly 1980's chandelier that was reminiscent of a wagon wheel, but with less charm, and replaced it with these cool track lights. He worked really hard getting them up and they are gorgeous, but the result is a dark kitchen! We are so disappointed. I hope there is a way to make them work without having to take it all down and replace it with another chandelier. I don't know if our ceilings are so high that the light isn't reaching all the way down. I wonder if we need to reposition the lights, or the bulbs can be replaced with something brighter, or if we add more lights to the track that will give me the bright kitchen I want.

We went shopping for cork floors. Based on reviews, I like US Floors, but they only sell through dealers. Their cork was about $9/s.f. Very expensive. We found cork at Lumber Liquidators for about $3/s.f., but the sample they gave us was so soft that I could tear it and dent it with my fingernails. That's not going to work for me. I'm so sad to have to reconsider my dream of cushy cork floors, but need something durable. I guess Conrad can put the same tile in the kitchen that he's putting by the front and back doors, and I can buy squishy foam rugs for all the standing I do in front of the stove and sink.

What A Beautiful Kitchen!

Even though we only did school one day, it was such a busy week that by Saturday I was utterly exhausted and stayed home from church. Friday, I took Jacob and his friend to Kennedy Space Center. It was a lot of fun hanging out with friends, but it was so hot outside! I drank a lot of water but still got dehydrated. I had a migraine at one point and was quietly panicking because my vision blacked out, but it passed, thank God. I went grocery shopping on my way home, so was pretty tired after my long, hot day. I put a frozen pizza in the oven for the boys' supper. Conrad spent his morning guiding the person measuring our kitchen for counters, then he went for a long afternoon motorcycle ride and ate supper at a buffet place. When I got home, I saw a drawn line on the concrete to represent our counter for the bar. It was so small and disappointing, not what I had been envisioning all these months from the drawing. Conrad contacted the company to change the measurements and make the bar bigger, so hopefully that won't be an issue. If it is, I don't really care. I just want this remodel over and don't have much fight left anymore, lol.

I don't know if my CMT is responsible for how weak and tired I've been feeling, or if it's kitchen related stress. I try not to focus on CMT and just engage in life as much as possible, but feeling paralyzed definitely gets in the way!

I occasionally remember to take care of myself, and felt much better after getting half my hair chopped off last week, and I have an eye appointment this week.

This weekend at home was just what I needed. Our kitchen cabinets were installed over two days (there is still some minor work to do--toe kick, trim work, "skinning" the ends), so I felt peace and happiness after getting the rest of our house back in order and cleaning drywall dust off of everything. Our house doesn't feel so much like a construction zone anymore. I can't wait to take photos, because our ugly bare space has been turned into a warm, cozy kitchen. There's still quite a lot to do though. I'm waiting for Conrad to take down the plastic hanging down from the ceiling that is so annoying and ugly. He wants to spray additional popcorn onto the ceiling and he says it's time consuming and has toxic fumes. Conrad has to install the floor (but is waiting for the toe kicks to be installed), tile backsplash, put in track lighting, hook up the dishwasher and and our new faucet (once the counter and sink are in). Then I'll take pictures!

I love my Boos block kitchen island, and for now it is the only counter we have. It makes our kitchen a little crowded, but I'm not ready to get rid of it yet, so I'm trying to find out a new use for it. I'm also trying to figure out what to do with an antique table from Conrad's family, a red antique shelf from my family, the pot rack, and my huge bulletin board that used to be my message center and hold my calendar. My Goodwill stash keeps growing.